Lawn Gnome Slip 'n' Slide Party of Doom
by Audrey Lynne
Summary: Indoor slip-n-slides! Lawn gnomes! Phineas and Ferb, aged fourteen, go to visit Candace at college. Amusement and surprises ensue.


Chicago was a three-hour trip from the much quieter town of Danville, Illinois – a perfect distance for a college student to feel like they were getting away from home but still be close enough to get home regularly. Or have family visit, as this particular case was.

Candace Flynn had decided to attend college at her mother's alma mater in Chicago, no doubt due largely to the face that her boyfriend – now fiancé – Jeremy Johnson was attending the same school. Her parents had been thrilled to have her so close, though her brothers still found the house eerily quiet without Candace around. They adored their older sister, and so they jumped at the chance to go visit her one sunny April weekend.

Their parents had dropped them off at the train station in Danville, and three hours later, Phineas Flynn and Ferb Fletcher found themselves in the Windy City. It didn't take too much effort to find the nearest 'L' train stop that would get them to the campus – and from there, it was a simple matter to find Candace's dorm. It seemed that most matters were simple these days.

Phineas sighed to himself as he and his brother took in the campus. At fourteen, they didn't blend in all that well, but they weren't looking to. As he watched students playing games and enjoying themselves around him, Phineas couldn't help but think of That Summer wistfully. "That Summer" was always capitalized; it was the year they were ten, and Phineas and Ferb had made it their goal to do something different every single day. They had kept up the tradition the following year, but it was only the leftovers from That Summer; it just wasn't the same. Growing up was cool in a lot of ways, but on some basic level, it sucked. Sure, you got to do more as you got older, but when childhood left, it took a lot of innocence, creativity, and enthusiasm with it.

"Ferb?" Phineas asked as they approached Candace's dorm.

Ferb merely raised an eyebrow.

"If we ever get boring and inflexible, do you promise to smack me upside the head to shake me out of it?" That was Phineas' biggest fear about growing up, really. Sure, these college kids were having fun, but so many adults didn't. His parents seemed to be two of the lucky exceptions to the rule, but they had always been kind of goofy. That was okay with Phineas. He'd much rather have been the dorkiest adult on the face of the planet than to be the most boring.

Ferb nodded. "I promise, but only if you agree to hold my head underwater until I stop struggling if the same conditions are me."

Phineas laughed; Ferb may not have been much of a talker, but he had an awesome sense of humor. There wasn't much about Ferb that Phineas didn't find awesome. He adored his brother, even as they'd become teenagers and gotten to the age where they were "supposed to" get on each other's nerves.

The squeal of coeds caught Phineas' attention as he and Ferb stepped inside Candace's building. Candace was waiting to meet them in the lobby, and as soon as hugs were exchanged, Phineas just _had_ to investigate the laugher and continued squeals he kept hearing from around the corner.

"Oh, that." Candace sounded decidedly bored as she trotted along beside her younger brothers. "Yeah, they do this every weekend once it gets warm. At least until they get caught."

Around the corner, two lawn gnomes were holding down the first of a long stretch of black plastic trash bags covering most of the hallway's tiled floor. Two girls stood behind the gnomes, throwing buckets of water on the trash bags, and a number of college students in bathing suits were lined up.

The next student stepped up, holding his arms in the air, to applause from those gathered. "Hello, Mendelssohn Hall! It's good to be back. This one's for David and Steve, our loyal and steadfast gnomes. Without them, we would have no track stability." With that, he picked up the motorcycle helmet that was sitting atop one of the gnomes' hats, donned it, and dove onto the track, belly down.

"Whoa, an indoor Slip-n-Slide. Cool!" Phineas was impressed.

"Yeah, big whoop." Candace rolled her eyes. "I foresee some EMS calls in their future."

Ferb nodded. "Yes, obviously, their safety features could use some improvement. And the plastic trash bags are going to create a lot of drag."

"It could definitely be more streamlined," Phineas observed. Moments like _this_, speculating about the wacky, felt like That Summer, and they were getting fewer and farther between. Phineas fully intended to enjoy it while it lasted.

"Hey, Candace!" one girl shouted. "Come on; it's fun."

"No way!" Candace replied. "I don't care if you have a motorcycle helmet; I have zero interest in breaking other parts of me. Besides, my brothers are here."

"Hi, Candace's brothers!" several in the crowd called.

"Hi!" Phineas responded, amused. Ferb simply waved.

Candace snorted, glancing back at the crowd. "Puh-lease. You'd think with college classes, they could come up with something better. I mean, you guys could have done better when you were _ten_."

"Certainly," Ferb agreed.

"They're onto something," Phineas observed, "but they need better materials." He turned to Candace. Since he'd hit his growth spurt; they were about the same height. "Do you think they would be open to some suggestions on how to improve it?"

Candace opened her mouth to protest, but then stopped. And smiled. "The hallway on the opposite side of the building's clear – no rooms on it, even. They're renovating the interiors. You could start from scratch – if you want."

Right, like Phineas was going to turn down an opportunity like that. Ferb had a spark of excitement in his eyes as well. "You sure, Candace?" Phineas asked. "I mean, you always seemed concerned about our projects...."

"Yeah, 'cause they were wildly unsafe and there was no way I'd have gotten away with any of that crap." Candace waved a hand dismissively. "Pish-posh. Mom and Dad are in Danville and like you're going to build anything more dangerous than coasting toward a brick wall on wet trash bags?"

Ferb glanced at Phineas. "She has a good point."

"Of course I do." Candace took a deep breath before placing a hand on each of her brothers' shoulders. "I never thought I would hear myself say this, but do me proud, boys."

Phineas grinned. This was going to be the best day ever.

- - - - - - - -

_Hey, y'all. Still working away on "Beauty and the Geek and Beyond," but this image popped into my head, and as it didn't fit into the time line I'm going with in that story, I had to jot it down so I could focus on the story I was **trying** to write. I heard the indoor Slip-n-Slide tale from a friend when I was in college, and ever since, I've not been able to shake the sneaking suspicion that it would be wicked fun but wildly unsafe. Add lawn gnomes and you have the recipe for a story._


End file.
